I Was Molested on Spirit Airlines

I always tried not to be one of those passengers that cried for the good ole days of airlines.

But my latest trip from Houston to Orlando, had me crying in more ways than one.

I thought I was so lucky that IAH in Houston was practically empty.  There wasn't a soul in the security line and Spirit Gate number A25 was clean, quiet, and had a charger station. 

Well all that heaven in the airport didn't prepare me for the devil that was riding on Flight 832.

Unfortunately, I was seated in a B seat which means a middle seat.  At first I could have carried less until I sat down. The seat was made for a toddler.  Let me correct myself, a toddler from the 1950s when every kid was skinny and malnourished. Not the fat ass toddlers of today.

The lady in the window seat would be classified as obese. Her feet fat was squeezing out of her oh so nice crocs. I told her she had a good look for Disney which is where she was bragging she was going. Needless to say, she melted into my seating area.

 The old guy that sat in seat C never heard of deodorant.  My GOD he had a fucking sweater on when the temperature in Houston was 90 degrees and Orlando was 89 degrees.  WHY DO YOU HAVE SWEATER ON???  

What made matters worse was he kept touching me in odd areas.  He was always polite about it but he kept poking and touching. I closed my eyes and prayed to Budda and clicked my heels three times hoping to be in Orlando already. And just my luck the moment my eyes was closed my nipple got pinched. 

Oh by the way, we had a ground hold because there was a fault on seat c on row 29.  The problem was we only had 26 rows of seats.  It took Spirit Airlines 45 minutes to figure out that the fault was incorrect. Now that was 45 minutes of my knees, stomach and nipples being molested by the smelly old man.

I hate you Spirit. 

Emmys Present Another TV Blackout and So the Fuck What!!

Black people we love to complain about nonsense.

So now everyone is suppose to be upset because black folks didn't win shit at the Emmy Awards. 

Well let me let you in on a secret.  

WE DIDN'T DESERVE ANY FUCKING EMMYS THIS YEAR.

Don't get me wrong, I like Scandal (not love) and I like Kerry Washington.

But for every half decent Scandal you get bullshit like anything from Tyler Perry. Tyler Perry's shows are just shitty.  I mean each and every one of them deserve the garbage pile.  House of Payne=Garbage, For Better or For Worse=Garbage, Love Thy Neighbor=Garbage. Why the Mighty Oprah allowed him to put garbage on her OWN network is incredible.

Now, I am not just hating on Tyler Perry to just hate on him.  I admire the brother and I am pleased that he gives back to the community.  But with all his goodwill, that doesn't mean he gets a pass to give us low class entertainment. 

Now back to the Emmys.  

This year's nominations were poor pickings for blacks and we need to acknowledge that.

Years past, like when HBO's The Wire was on, that show should have walked away with Emmy Gold but its been off the air for years and it was not only snubbed but competed with arguably the best show on tv at time and history The Sopranos. 

It's time to stop complaining and either put up or shut up. We have too many talented directors, writers, actors, and producers to constantly be putting out bullshit like The Haves and the Have Nots. 

Until then, expect the Emmy Desert. 

Get it Together, Andre. DAMN!!!

One of the hardest things for me to do is to admit that I am the reason why I'm not happy.

Now I am a firm believer that money brings happiness when you haven't had it all your life.  But winning the lottery not withstanding, I can be happier now.

First thing to do to be happier is to upgrade my look.  

I want to lose at least 30 pounds and hit the weights to tone up a bit.  I am at my heaviest right now and I am not happy looking in the mirror. Even my Southern Bell of a mother had something sarcastic to say about my weight gain.  I guess she broke her Golden Rule of "if you don't have something nice to say, just shut the fuck up." Hell, I can't be mad at her.  She was right. I do need to push away from the table.

By the way, I have a good plan and I actually have everything I need to get started on this diet/lifestyle change.  Yes, it's a lifestyle change because I do not want to fall for the same shit over and over again. But, I have to be in a space to get it done.  No long trips, no drama, no boredom, and no interruptions with bullshit to make me mad. I noticed that every time I get upset over some bullshit, I go straight to some fast food joint.  

Plus, I have been rather funky slow with visiting the barber and that's never a good look. I look better with short hair and with a nice clean beard.  That means a visit to the barber weekly.  Yes weekly!!!!

Well, I get back from Houston on Thursday and I think I should start my diet on that day.  I am moving so I will not have time to stop at Burger King or any other fast fat place.  So today I officially weigh 205.

Let's get Project Happiness Started.